The world has sped up considerably in the last decade, causing many families to eat meals on the run, in the car and accelerated to such a degree that family conversation and connection are often sacrificed.  Since our 24/7 pace does not look like it’s going to slow down any time soon, families have to create a new family meal tradition that preserves what’s most important – connecting with family – whether you have an hour or just 15 minutes.

Whether you gather around your family dinner table or share a meal outside the home, it’s the quality of that gathering that matters.  If you are going out for a meal, make the most of the experience and the time you have together.  Chat in the car, don’t rush the food ordering, have something to drink and things to talk about while you are waiting for your food, and then take your time together to eat and talk.  Leave as much time as possible between your mealtime and your next appointment or errand so that you’re not looking at your watch or encouraging the children to eat faster.   Take advantage of not having to cook by slowing down and enjoying your family!

If you’re eating in, prepare meals in advance to save time.  Or, purchase prepared foods and heat them up.  Get the whole family involved in the meal preparation and use that opportunity to converse and connect.  The key to making the new alternatives work (especially the “take out” and restaurant visits) is to slow things down when you sit at the table and just enjoy being together.

Ten years ago the phrase “overscheduled kids, under connected families” wasn’t part of the American lexicon. Today it is practically the definition of a middle class family. A decade of research shows that children who eat dinner with their families on a regular basis get better grades, are more likely to confide in parents and eat healthier. If you’re a parent who wants to learn more about this growing issue, read on.

• More mealtime at home was the single strongest predictor of better achievement scores and fewer behavioral problems in children. Mealtime was more powerful than time spent in school, studying, church, playing sports, or art activities.¹

• The largest federally funded study of American teenagers found a strong association between regular family meals (five or more dinners per week with a parent) and academic success, psychological adjustment, and lower rates of alcohol use, drug use, early sexual behavior, and suicidal risk. ²

• A medical study of children ages 9-14 found that those who have more regular dinners with their families have more healthful dietary patterns, including more fruits and vegetables, less saturated and trans fat, fewer fried foods and sodas, and more vitamins and other micronutrients.³

The more often children share the evening meal with their families, the less likely they are to smoke, drink or use drugs. Teens who have two or less family dinners per week compared to teens who have five family dinners are⁴ :

• Three times likelier to try marijuana

• Two and a half times likelier to smoke cigarettes

• More than one and a half times likelier to drink alcohol

¹Sandra L. Hofferth, "Changes in American Children's Time, 1981-1997." University of Michigan's Institute for Social Research, Center Survey, January, 1999.

²Council of Economic Advisers to the President. (2000). "Teens and Their Parents in the 21st Century: An Examination of Trends in Teen Behavior and the Role of Parental Involvement." Report released May 2000. Analysis of the Adolescent Health Study, using a national probability sample of adolescents and parents.

³Gillman, M.W., Rifas-Shiman, S.L., Frazier, A.L., Rockette, H.R.H., Camargo, C.A., Field, A.E., Berkey, C.S., & Colditz, G.A. (2000). Family dinners and diet quality among older children and adolescents. Archives of Family Medicine, 9,235-240.

⁴National Center for Substance Abuse (CASA) at Columbia University